"All through dinner a silent rage courses through me. Judaism says I am an abomination, yet God and His commandments are supposed to be good. Mrs. Lowenstein says I can change, but I've tried and it didn't work. Neshama says God is just an idea made up by stupid men who say women can't love other women. What is God anyway? Some big guy in the sky? The creator? Creator of what? I know dinosaur bones are older than the Torah." Winner of So You Think You Can Write? Orca Book Publishers Novel contest. Is there any room in Orthodox Judaism for a distinctly unorthodox Jewish teenager? Ellie Gold has always embraced her faith-at least until she meets Lindsay. Faced with denying her sexuality or abandoning her community, Ellie looks to her mother, sister and grandmother to guide her, but in the end, her decisions are all her own.