It's like this giant secret that is right in front of everyone. One in five women and even more men don't have children-at least not their own. For more than half of them, it was not by choice. Their partners a) never wanted children, b) already had kids from a previous relationship, c) never quite felt ready for parenthood, d) had had a vasectomy, or e) had fertility problems. They are forced to make a choice between this man or woman they love and the children they might have had. Love or Children features the best of more than 700 posts and comments from the Childless by Marriage blog. Sue Fagalde Lick and her readers unveil situations and feelings they wouldn't dare tell their families, friends, partners, or even their therapists.