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I've had to have some tests I say. 'No not sure what's wrong I'll let you know if I find out anything'. I won't! I don't think it matters, really when your time's up, it's up. I just want to outlive my dogs. I hope I can do that. I sit there and think about life, my life, what's it about? Have I been happy, am I happy now? A lot of shit has happened during the years. Some good stuff too, I don't think they balance out so good. I'm not sure if I'm happy or not.