NIGHTMARES IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD is a sequel to HORRORS OF THE HOUSEHOLD. But is it SCARIER? Or does that depend on what page you're on? The DOORKNOB DEMON probably isn't too scary, unless of course you're trying to turn a doorknob. But what about other creatures FROM HERE TO THE CORNER ? Here are three. TREE TROLLS, TREE TROLLS, they're hungry and they have no souls! So should you want to hug a tree Be sure it's all there is to see. Or Snap! (your spine), and Crack! (your back), >THE SIDEWALK SERPENT sucks your bones out through your skin Till you're narrow as a pin, And doesn't stop till the sidewalk >THE LAMPOST GENIE Lights its globe In a manner quite insane: It draws off the electricity You use to light your brain. HORRORS JUST A STROLL FROM HOME features some bad dudes, such as THE PIGEON IMPOSTER It looks just like a pigeon; It pecks just like one too, But after it's through digesting its food, It drops what's left on you. THE DUMPSTER MUMMY Will shriek just for the shock, Blasting foul breath in your face, Then plunge you deep in the dumpster's >THE APARTMENT BUILDING BORE is never angry, never sore. Its voice is never loud, It doesn't scream, it doesn't roar. It talks to you in monotones, Its voice just drones...and drones...and drones... Like the tones of ancient telephones >And watch out for WEIRD WALLS, When you're snoozing in your bed, Walls you breathe in through your nose >The closer to the edge of town you get, >If you catch TUNNELITIS, You'll hear harsh noises in the dark- A hiss, a howl, a growl, a bark, A flutter of many wings, and then >In the GHOST MALL Though the air feels motionless, Drafts sigh through the holes Of the donuts in the donut shop >The male mannequins look lifeless, But then you see what's wrong: Their chins sprout hair, and their fingernails >They rise up from their pedestals And writhe around in the air, As if they're being tortured >I can't expose to anyone reading this to the POPCORN PANIC, or the TRAINIAC. You're probably too young! Finally, farther than the edge of town, there is THE VISITOR They found it there one midnight It had washed up on the shore And no one ever said That they had seen it there before. But they must have all been waiting for it, That's how it looked to me- For several days I'd seen them Standing staring out to sea. Read Nightmares in the Neighborhood at your own risk! The author is not responsible for the cost in time and treasure to revive someone who has fainted dead away.
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