Norman Spooter awakens one morning to find that his eyeballs have fallen in love with each other. They proceed to tear themselves out of his head, steal his car keys, and take off for parts unknown... So he does what any of us would probably do in that situation... he goes back to bed, hoping it'll all resolve itself. Unfortunately, in the middle of the night, a pack of WOLVES moves in. The worst thing is, they're party wolves... BUT they gave him a security deposit, so he decides he's going out to get his eyeballs back. He joins forces on his epic quest with a woman named Zoe, who has a mysterious secret almost as crazy as Norman's Party Wolves. Besides, she needs him too... She's on the run from her psychopathic ex-boyfriend, who happens to be a dangerous sociopath, a classic car enthusiast and, worst of all, a fully grown walrus. The road trip/chase novel is flipped on its head with everyone chasing everyone... explosions, battles and madness are the drivers in this particular race, along with a few stops in such places as the Motel Sick and a cult town in North Dakota featuring some dangerous hooded guys who'll pretty much marry anything to anything. With violence and insanity nipping at his heels and a race against the clock to get his body parts back, this could turn out very badly for Norman Spooter.