DON'T WANT TO OFFEND ANYONE? THEN DON'T F*%#&IN' BUY THIS BOOK! -What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? "She choked." -How do you get a blonde's eyes to sparkle? "Shine a light in her ear." -What's the definition of "making love"? "It's what a woman does while a man's screwing her." -How does an Englishman know that his wife is dead? "Sex is still the same, but the dishes are piling up in the sink." -What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? "One less drunk at the funeral." -Why is a fat woman like a scooter? "They're both fun to ride, but you wouldn't want you friends to see you on either." -A woman walked into the bank to deposit a large bag of cash. ""Did you hoard all this money yourself?" asked the teller. "No," she replied. "My sister whored half of it.""
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