A is for armpit, which smells when your hot, specially great hairy ones. They smell A LOT. Hi! Salvatore d'Amato here ¿ call me Sal if you must ¿ and I am not writing a diary! I'm writing the best alphabet ever. An alphabet of Dire and Disgusting Ditties. I'm up to two letters a week, and I reckon it will take me the rest of term to complete my masterpiece. By then I plan to have achieved my Number One ain in life ¿ to find a girlfriend. After all, I'm already twelve, so I can't afford to wait much longer¿ "Rhymes, sauciness, letters, irony, comedy, comic characters¿ a proper little turn-on for boys. A must-buy book." BOOKS FOR KEEPS.