In this book, I tell the story of my second year in Israel since making aliyah from South Africa in 2018. While it includes the few triumphs and far more failings, it does reveal certain ideas that transcend the individual and emotional pain that surrounds any person's life in a world that by definition will cause one some pain and suffering. Yet is is optimistic ultimately, for the mind can grow and shift in consciousness amidst change and instability. It is at these moments that the reader may gain in leafing through these pages. Curiously, like the fate of many of my paintings, writings and drawings, like childhood memories is the loss of 70 pages of wring while penning my thoughts down due to a computer saving error. One always wonders what might have been on those pages; the remaining pages, the revealed content being but traces. What is hidden and lost and irretrievable may have been the code, the elixir, the an(m)swer. Or is it still there is the revealed dimension - in this book?