When you've spent a lifetime narrating television shows, doing voice work on commercials, and navigating the music business, you hear some jokes. Pat Duke, the beloved narrator of the smash hit Swamp People on The History Channel, shares a hysterical and thought-provoking collection of punchlines, one-line zingers, observations, and advice on a variety of topics. Nothing is off limits: You'll enjoy laugh-out-loud moments about work, retirement, marriage, divorce, drinking, drugs, religion, obesity, vegans, kids, parents, life, death, sleep, farts, and poop. Mostly these are jokes, but the author sprinkles in sage advice as well as stories about the flat-out weird. The book includes three "groaners," six Golden Oldies, and a tendency to channel Rodney Dangerfield. The author doesn't know where that comes from. Is it politically correct? No. Is it misogynistic. No. (Well, maybe a little.) Honestly, the author loves women. And women? Why are you reading this? Stop. Everyone else, pull up a throne, sit for a while, and laugh your butt off with Thoughts on the Pot.