Part one of the book explains the destructive relationship styles and provides examles from Gary Brandstadt's case histories. The consequences of the relationship style is explored and self-tests are employed to help the reader recognize the behaviour tendencies. A "punchline" closes each chapter with a brief synopsis of what the reader must do to recognize and overcome this behaviour.
Part two fo the book focusses on the underlying fears that men have which drive them to adopt the destructive relationships with women in the first place. Fear of "losing" either personally or publically being the primay motivator for the unwanted behaviours. The book then goes on to illustrate the five essential qualities that men often see in other men that we look up to as true heroes and leaders, the qualities of Awareness, Compassion, Strength, Dignity and Courage. These qualities are defined and explored in the context of men's "self-talk", self identity and self-esteem. The authors suggest changing behaviours in the destructive relationship styles by drawing on these essential, and heroic, qualities to change one's self-image. Ultimately, the most important relationship men have is with themself and their own self image.
Five Ways Men Ruin Their Lives with Women is a must read book for men and women seeking to rebuild shattered men in their life.
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