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  • Format: ePub

When Eric Foster was an infant Osiris the Alien gave him a translucent orb containing Socrates' yo-yo, a vial of the Buddha's tears, Geronimo's bible, Cleopatra's hand-mirror, Crazy Horse's moccasins, a Niklaus Copernicus telescope lens, the toothpick Teddy Roosevelt chewed charing up San Juan Hill, Leonardo da Vinci's scissors, Van Gogh's painting trowel, a box of Christopher Columbus cigars, and a lock of the Minotaur's hair. Eric hauls his relics to Happytime Hot Springs Boulder Colorado. Osiris shows up. Eric befriends Andy the Inter-Dimensional Hot Springs Dog and competes for Atlantean…mehr

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Produktbeschreibung
When Eric Foster was an infant Osiris the Alien gave him a translucent orb containing Socrates' yo-yo, a vial of the Buddha's tears, Geronimo's bible, Cleopatra's hand-mirror, Crazy Horse's moccasins, a Niklaus Copernicus telescope lens, the toothpick Teddy Roosevelt chewed charing up San Juan Hill, Leonardo da Vinci's scissors, Van Gogh's painting trowel, a box of Christopher Columbus cigars, and a lock of the Minotaur's hair. Eric hauls his relics to Happytime Hot Springs Boulder Colorado. Osiris shows up. Eric befriends Andy the Inter-Dimensional Hot Springs Dog and competes for Atlantean granola-girl Valentina Meraki's affections with Hardbreath the shape-shifter. When Colonel Chemtrail and the Space Force Hot Spots arrive Happytime happy times rocket over the moon. That's when Laughing Disease pandemics the planet, Glenda the Glacier goes rogue, and Marty the Meteor decides to mash Earth's potatoes. Famed film director Quentin Quarantino and assistant Clora Quinn are making a Happytine documentary. "This will win an Academy Award."

Labor Day. Marty pierces Earth's gravitational influence and it's goodbye Happytime hello last open cosmic portal, in Chaco Canyon, New Mexico. The Minotaur and Teddy Roosevelt smash an alien-FBI roadblock, da Vinci and Van Gogh paint a solid-rock shortcut the aliens and FBI crash into like Wile E. Coyote chasing Roadrunner, and Colonel Chemtrail's bomb-vest thwarts himself and the final alien assault. Happytimers pop through the portal seconds before Marty bowling-pins Earth, the Happytime gang rodeo-riding the Milky Way to Sirius the Dog Star, safe among galactic creatures knowing how to dodge a meteor better than any human.

A perception-provoking defiance of reality with a hundred humorous spins, Poof is one part Eastern Mysticism, one part Magical Realism, and one part what's left of American Gumption, a modern Alice in Wonderland, a butt-load of fun.


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Autorenporträt
tenderbastard is a songwriter, playwright, screenwriter, novelist, activist, pancake enthusiast. He and his dog are public intellectuals. - tenderbastard.com

"There's a thin line between sexiness and absurdity and tenderbastard is determined to find it." ~ Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

"His writing is like Jack Kerouac and Douglas Adams." ~ A Novel Way

"As good as anything on Broadway." - Jeff Horn, director ~ Moon Over Mangroves. - youtube.com/tenderbastard

"One of the great literary finds of the decade." ~ Doris Chu, editor

"I have met tenderbastard and find his writing witty. This book review confirms that conviction." ~ President Barack Obama

Other books at tenderbastard.com

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Sticks and Stones - Dylan Sticks and Seamus Stones save the Colorado Territory from being boon-swoggled by Samuel Sidewinder Sullivan and his oily accomplice, Senator Billfold Haggle. Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Finn, look out, Sticks and Stones are in town.

Thank You for Being My Boy by Georgia the well-heeled terrier hound. Adventure, intrigue, insights and all the love in a dog's heart.