Frankie Lassut

The Smaller Conspiracy (Fun and Fantasy, #23) (eBook, ePUB)

• Format: ePub

Produktbeschreibung

Conspiracy theories usually get dismissed by worker, who can't believe that THEY would plot against us lowlies. Members of THEY dismiss them because THEY don't want to get rumbled as the playful darlings love their fun and games; and the truth stays invisible, hidden in plain sight. But this time no one can dismiss the truth because it is so plain to see, even if the seer's head is shoved up their botty.
The 'terrible' truth won't slap you in the face because it will be 'inside' your face; that's because in some cases, you'll be chewing it. So, don't read this little offering while you are standing up as the sudden realisation what is happening to you may shock you so much your legs will give way.
It's in two parts. Firstly an academic waffles on about the world of retail in the usual academic way and then I'll tell you what the academic can't. As a little comfort offering I can tell you that it will happen slowly so you probably won't notice ... until it's too late and the last thing you ever see are teeth. Good luck.

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Produktdetails

• Verlag: Frankie Lassut
• Erscheinungstermin: 18. Januar 2016
• Englisch
• ISBN-13: 9781310654688
• Artikelnr.: 46921885

Autorenporträt

I am the one being shaved; the other one Nim, is is a looney bin now!
I went to see a psychic years ago who ended up as my girlfriend; she didn't see that one coming! But she was extremely honoured. However it ended badly i.e. it rained heavily as I buried her body and I got soaked. No! You don't really want to hear about it, it's depressing; I was joking about the burial. She told me that I was to uncover a talent I had ... Well, another psychic told me that as the first one was dead; I was lying when I said I was lying. Nothing happened for quite a while. Suddenly I realised I needed a 'job' quite badly as I was beginning to drink halves. No, not a boob 'job'! I went for the cheap option i.e. the surgeon gave some socks to shove up my jumper when I go out. I got a 'job' (have you got boobs on your mind?) because someone told me that bus-driving was easy because you just sit on your butt and turn the wheel. She was about six, a wise woman ... that's called an oxymoron. Fantastic! I thought get the job and in a couple of days I'd be driving all the nice passengers around and about seeing all the sights for a fraction of the cost of a tour bus; and we'd have a roof in case it rained. Easy! First of all though there was the training; and I entered hell.

I was born in Cumbria in a little ex-iron ore mining town called Millom. It was only small, a one- horse town; the horse was called Peg. It had a pedigree name too, but I can't remember it at the moment: Peggy Suss? However, I got fed up and left as I was the only man in a town full of women and they were all lesbys; I've always been lucky. I went to Blackpool and attended the photographic college. I then moved to Coventry and met the psychic who would tell me what was going to happen. I could say now that the rest is history. Well it is, but obviously not history as that's all made up anyway. Then I got the job bus-driving, which as I said is easy 'you just sit on your butt and turn the wheel'. The bus station management weren't pleased that she had said that though, so she was tried and sent to Guantanamo Bay; they have a section for young kids who are bad to the bone.

The job was so mad that I thought it would be a good idea to write out some posters and stick them all on the wall of the bus station. The other drivers enjoyed them, but the management tore them down, the badstars (that's an anagram of astards +B). I carried on and ended up with a manuscript for a book, which, by ...