Shortly after Christmas 2020, we were told by our doctor that he saw a little more fluid than normal in the baby's head. Concerned, he sent us to a specialist at twenty-two weeks. The specialist did an ultrasound. About thirty minutes later, I was taken back to his office to speak about what he saw. Due to COVID-19, my husband couldn't be there. Without offering to call my husband, the doctor told me our baby's head was swollen with fluid because she never developed brain tissues. Also, because her brain didn't develop, other parts of her vital organs had defects. Some of those defects included the loss of the function to swallow, part of her heart having defects, and her face and toes being abnormally formed. I didn't cry in his office, probably due to shock. Briella's swollen head was putting my life in danger and could have been fatal if I kept her any longer. The sense of urgency was unfathomable and devastating. Having to lose our baby that we wanted so badly and for whom we waited three years broke us. There are very few people who talk about child loss because it's so hard and painful. People don't know how to react to us. Once we started to tell our story, we realized that losing a child at any stage is a lot more common than we thought. We wanted to write this book to offer awareness and a different perspective.
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